Why Yes, Mezzos Do Have the Sense of Humor of 12 Year Old Boys

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Tonight is my first concert with Big Nationally Known Period Instrument Orchestra. Yay!!!

Further proof that all those trouser roles have gone to my head, here is a sampling of things that I've scribbled in my score in the last couple of days:

-Silent games of hangman with my tenor friend who sits next to me (the words we choose? "Hamburger" "Butthead" "Tom is a Tool"*)
-Adding an "s" to the word "breast" in a recitative sung by Famous British Countertenor, which makes the sentence "What sacred horrors shake my breast! Ah! 'Tis the pow'r divine confessed! Who can his energy control? He comes, he comes, and fires my soul" extra, extra funny.
(I mean, it's pretty funny already, but I think that the unintended innuendo gets better when it's "breasts." Am I wrong?)
-changing the words to a recitative cadence from "prepare to answer thy offended queen!" to "prepare to answer, I'm a flaming queen!"
(no, I was not making a judgmental comment about the person singing this recit. I just think that these words fit the notes better than what Handel wrote)

So yes, my sense of humor is horrible and reprehensible.

This follows in the grand tradition of changing the words to some of Handel's frequently sung music. A friend of mine was singing "Where e'er you walk" several years ago and accidentally sang "Trees where you shit" instead of "sit." At the Conservatory there was the perennial Messiah concert that was so tiresome folks would daydream about changing "There were shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over the flock by night" to "There were shepherds imbibing in the fields, drinking scotch on the rocks by night."

Not to even mention Latin. I mean, Hildegard actually uses the word "speculum." And "nati poenas inclyti" really? That joke just makes itself.....

Anyway, yes, I have the mind of a 12 year old boy.....'cept with bigger words.
I just needed to make that confession and get it out of my system now, so I don't giggle all the way through the oratorio!

*This dude Tom is being a total tool. He keeps turning around and glaring at the row behind him when someone sings a wrong note, or apparently even when they sing in a way he doesn't like. He also walks around trilling, just to prove that he can, or something....ugh, tenors


Celeste Winant said...


Maggie Jochild said...

Well, as a 12-year-old girl, I had the same sense of humor. So I don't think it's necessarily related to gender, only to a certain freedom of mind.

In church we (of the younger set) would whisper before a hymn was announced that the title was "What the bride said on her wedding night". Inevitably, the hymn or a key line in it would send us into paralyzing hysterics for which we would be roundly chewed out after service. You can imagine how dirty things can become...

kat said...

ooooopsss....yes, you're right. The gender doesn't matter. I should have said "most commonly associated with boys" or something, since potty humor is often trained out of girls.

Also, that's hysterical, Maggie!

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